20 years old never had a gf PLEASE HELP

people easily feel lost on big campus for sure!! you can definitely try on a few girls if you wish!! if doesn't work, try ask someone in your classroom/when you participate a campus event or join a club something so at least you have something in common with the girl!). if you discover a girl who share the same values with you, that'd be even better!! GOOD LUCK!!

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Woman Advice Please !

So I've been dating my Scorpio F/ 24 for 3 months now. I'm a Pisces M/28 last Friday I had my birthday party early at local restaurant/bar. I had all my close friends job the party. I had a DD who did not drink all night. I obviously had more to drink then everyone else. I'm not a big drinker I might add. So I threw up in the bathroom.

My Scorpio brought it up to my attention on Monday my actual birthday feb 24th.She bought me a very nice thoughtful gift, let alone one for my sister since her bday is the day after mine. I just had a dinner with her and my family only. So I noticed something was wrong with her. So we talked after dinner. she did not want to talk about it, but I told her we might as well. She said I was rude for not apologizing for my actions right away on Friday. I know it's a little my fault for allowing my self to get drunk but it's the only day of the year I do that.( not the best excuse) I told her I had no idea I was rude she said I kissed her after i threw up that I understand her being mad about. But I asked all the friends honest opinion, and they said I was acting pretty mellow.

So she said she needs time to think about us. I called her Monday night after she got home and apologized once more . She said okay , I'll ttyl something like that. I text her on Tuesday night saying: Hey just wanted to tell you I've been thinking a lot about what you said. I want to apologize for what happened Friday, it was really selfish of me, and I'm sorry that I put you through that. You have every right to be upset. It will never happen again. I know it will take time to make it up to you. I hope you have a goodnights rest. Sweet dreams

She said: well i'm glad you've been thinking about it. goodnight, sleep well

Wednesday Morning I texted her : Good morning Hope you slept good .
Not sure when your leaving to SD to see your sis, but wanted to say drive safe . Text me when you get there, so I know you got there safe .
Her: thank you. i think i'm going to go tomorrow instead. have a nice day.

I texted her later that night : Just letting you know I'm thinking about you . Hope you had a good day . Night

Her: thanks, sleep well.

So two days go by and friday she texts me at 11:50 pm hope you had a nice day goodnight.
I texted back thanks you too. Saturday I called her to figure out what we're going to do about us . In short she says lets keep dating and if I want I can date other people. WTF?

So sunday she texts me , hey hope you had a good day yesterday ( probably cause I went out with some girls and they tagged me on IG ) I said it was great how was your's her: pretty good can't complain. Me : cool have fun baking with your mom! tell her i say hi ! her : ok will do

Last night she texts me at 10 pm How was your day? Me: good and your's her: it was good, first day back at work so it was nice. ME cool cool Her : did you work on your truck today? Me: nope still waiting on the parts from the sponsors. Her : oh i see Me: night her :goodnight

Does she really want me in her life ? I really care about her let alone love her family. We've gone from being in a relationship to dating and not seeing other people to going to just dating in 3 months. I seriously i have idea what to think. We had a similar talk a month ago.. I want this to work out any advice? Or should I bring it up how disappointed I am?

Thank You for reading

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NEED NEED ADVICE PLEASE!!!

Last Thursday I met this girl on Thursday in my friends room and we talked for a while and she is the girl you could have a conversation about anything with her.... So that night I added her on Facebook. We got talking on there and where really getting close.. so on Saturday and Sunday I had a total of a 2 hour phone call with her. So everything sounds good the only problem she has a boyfriend!

Normally she only comes to Uni on Tuesday morning but she decided to come Monday night just for me she said so that night she came to my room and my room mate was there so we talked but coudn't get intimate. So the day after she came over while my room mate wasnt there and we stayed together in my room again this time I put my arm round her and she came closer and closer and she even put her head on my chest while we were holding hands. She had broke up with her boyfriend the day before and her excuse was she was a lesbian which was only a cover up. And then towards the end of that night my m8's and her ex kept going hows your bf and gf and since then she has been distant with me cause i made the stupid mistake of saying mabye we should just stay friends for awhile but im scared thats going to put her off me now.

The day after I met up with her in the library infront of all her friends which was really hard for me not knowing them we talked abit but everything we had in common or our own little jokes were secretive. And she said she would come over tonight but stayed with her best friend who is a boy that night :/

I know this might sound childish but she is honestly the nicest and prettiest girl i have ever met and really dont want to loose her. Please tell me what I should do because I am running out of ideas. I know I may sound desperate but I cant help it.

Thank you for your advice I really need it.
Sam

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i dont know what to believe.... please help

hello everybody,

a little about us, we havent been together for too long,only 4months. we have a long distance relationship.everything has been ok so far but one week i couldnt reach him for bout 3 days and he said someone in his family died and i couldnt be mad because i didnt know whether it was true or not so i gave him another chance.
now recently, last weekend he was supposed to come over, but he didnt show up. tried calling and calling and calling for the whole weekend nobody answered. i was kind of pissed, thinking that hes been playing with me all along and that i was just too stupid to see it.so i sent him a few fd up messages. then i hear from his friend on that sunday telling me he is in the hospital, he hurt his back. (didnt believe it) he called the next day and told me what supposedly happened. i didnt really listen but anyways, is there any chance that this may be true? i think that if u really want to, u will find a way to let that person know what happened. obviously i was waiting the whole weekend for some kind of call or a sign that he is ok. he thinks that i overreacted and that im wrong for sending him these f'd up messages. what do yall think?

You either trust him or you don't, which I believe he's done something that you doubt about what he's done and said. I think the best option would be talk to him about this situation face-to-face, and be firm about what you feel about it because if you don't say it, then he will continue and will also take advantage of that. Find a time and sit down and talk to him, ask what you feel about it to see how he reacts to that. Then go from then, but if your feeling still bothers you, then I think you're right about the trusting issue.

Not sure if you would agree with me, but girls do have this very strong distinct feeling when something is not right with our guy. While you should give him the benefit of the doubt I suggest you also take note of your doubts. Be on guard but not to the point that you ruin everything before you even find out the truth.

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Didn't know it was a date? Accidentally friend zoned her :'( help please

Hello everyone. I would like your help on this, I am not sure what to do but here goes:

Me and this girl had met during a night out through a friend. We had a great time and I asked if she would like to catch a movie some time. (She had given me her number, I didn't specifically ask for hers) she said yes, so we watched a film (she bought the tickets) and then we went to my place for half an hour. She had met my family and said that they were great and before leaving she said "I'd like to do this again some time." She had then invited me to watch a movie with her and her friend after I asked if she'd like to watch one with me. So I did and we had a great time. Then the day after, I asked if she would like to grab a coffee with me to which she said yes and we ended up going to town for 4 hours and then back to hers for 3 or so hours. We had a great time, we were constantly laughing and smiling, we had a lot more in common than I had thought and I would have loved to do this again some time. But before I left hers, I asked if she would like to go out as more than friends? To which she replied: "didn't we do that today?" And I said: "well, it wasn't very clear..." (I don't know what I was thinking " then she said: "I am not looking for a boyfriend at the moment and I'll be going back home in a couple of months" (she lives on the other side of the planet, she is only in England for a couple of months) so I asked again and she said the same thing followed by an "awww, ill text you." So I left but texted her later first saying I had a great time thanks to which she replied "me too, sorry if I disappointed you." This is when I replied with the worst thing I could have done since I felt like I made her feel bad I said "don't worry it's natural. I am still glad we are friends, long distance relationships don't work out anyway :P just thought i'd let you know how I felt. She then replies with "I hope you have fun at university, I'd better get some sleep. I don't want to be tired for work tomorrow." (Did I accidentally friend zone her?

How do I unfriendzone her? Did I even do this in the first place?
Should I ask her on another date?
Do I bring this up and explain that I was nervous and didn't know what came over me?
How do I let her know I still want to be more than friends?

I had sent her an mms the following day be she hasn't replied. I am not sure if she can receive them as she is on pay as you go. Help :'(.

We get along so well no awkward silences, laughing all the time and we pretty much had one long conversation for the whole day. And advice would be appreciated. I think that if we did not have the distance problem, that we would be going out on another date no problem. That is just my thought.

Thank you in advance.

Last edited by Harry94; 01-07-2014 at 12:34 PM.

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I think that if we did not have the distance problem, that we would be going out on another date no problem.Hi Harry,

I think it's a done deal bro. She's made it very clear what she wants and why she wants it. It's very important for you to respect that. Do you see how worried and stressed you've become? You're over thinking everything now...and that's a horrible place to try to relate to anyone from.

Question for you...

Why tell her the following, "I am still glad we are friends, long distance relationships don't work out anyway"? Is that REALLY how you feel towards her? What could you have said differently that was more honest? Sharing a little more about this comment may help to release some of the worrying you're doing...

Hi Harry,
Question for you...

Why tell her the following, "I am still glad we are friends, long distance relationships don't work out anyway"? Is that REALLY how you feel towards her? What could you have said differently that was more honest? Sharing a little more about this comment may help to release some of the worrying you're doing...

Thank you for your reply Mark, I guess I have never connected with anyone so well and I'd rather try to be friends than lose her forever. I don't even think she wants to be friends any more to be honest. I have asked if she'd like to chat and she has responded but she has never started a conversation first. (she gave me her e-mail for Skype, but we haven't had a conversation on there yet and I won't be the one starting it either)

I have decided to try and ignore her and hopefully if she would still like to be friends she will contact me first over the next few days.

If she doesn't... Then I will be crushed over losing possibly the most relatable person I have ever met.

Should I try to hang out with her again when I am next available? Or is our friendship also something I will never get back?

- Harry

It sounds like a really big misunderstanding, in my opinion. You all was getting along so well and having a great time with each other. And when the conversation about....

" But before I left hers, I asked if she would like to go out as more than friends? To which she replied: "didn't we do that today?" And I said: "well, it wasn't very clear..."

I think she might have thought you was asking for more of a serious relationship, maybe even sexual is what she might have been thinking. The best thing to do is clear the air, don't let this misunderstand mess up a really good friendship that could actually become more later. I think if you are honest with her, she will respect it and maybe you two can start fresh again.... good luck!!!!

The best thing to do is clear the air, don't let this misunderstand mess up a really good friendship that could actually become more later. I think if you are honest with her, she will respect it and maybe you two can start fresh again.... good luck!!!!I agree with wahcashmom Harry. Be honest with her and see what happens.

Let us know how it goes.

Thanks for your input guys, this is exactly what I wanted to do. I have texted her and she said she is busy but she'll let me know. (she started the text with "ill let you know?" so I'm waiting for a reply. Hopefully we will see each other and catch up. I'll start a normal convo and if she is acting differently, I'll bring it up. I'll let you know how it goes.

Thanks again

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Please help, really confused...

Hi there,

I'll explain my situation really fast, I'll go into details later:

I've been in love with this girl for 6 months now, even broke up with my 10 year girlfriend for her, or sort of for her anyway...
I tried asking her out, it didn't work. I should point out, I'm French, and over here in rural France, dating is a little different... We don't ask girls out, for example, it's just not done... Don't ask me why, that's the way it is I guess.
She's extremely shy and extremely nice, 6 years my junior (I'm 31), and I keep thinking her behavior shows that she likes me, but then I get nothing.

She's incapable, I know, of making the first step, problem is I'm also extremely shy... But last week, I asked her if she was available to work on a project for our dance group that we were supposed to do together. She said sure, and invited me to her house. Of course, I was over the moon, I never expected that. She didn't have to, it came as a massive surpirse and yet she did. She knows perfectly well how I feel about her (you'd have to be blind not to see it) and she still invites me to her house!
Well anyway, I went there, we spent an amazing 5 hours talking about the project and other things. As I was leaving her house, I said "there's still something I want to tel you, but you already know what that is, don't you?" She changed the subject rapidly and repeatedly, to meaningless stuff. She was embarrassed, I know. She even told me she was so ill at ease she would turn into an ostrich (she was burying her head in her sweater collar).

But I still got no answer. I left, and I was so bummed out I decided to text her, and told her exactly how I felt (yes, the L word), saying I was sorry to embarrass her, asking her to please tell me something, a big fat no if it was her answer, or even a "I don't know" would have sufficed, if it was easier for her by text, Hell I don't know. She answered "Very embarrassed, yes... I'm gonna turn into a real ostrich. See you soon, bye!"

Now what the Hell does that mean? Yes? No? I don't know? What?

I'm crazy about this girl, and I think she's just confused and there's a small part of her that doesn't want to say no, but she's scared of something. Maybe me, maybe her past, maybe her future, her present situation, I don't know...

What do you guys think?

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Confused, mixed messages. Advice please xx

Hi well I've been going with this guy for about 4/5 weeks but only really seen each other 5-6 times. I don't want a friend with benefits and be says he's doesn't either. He gives me mixed messages and I don't really no what to think. He says we click and that he wants me to stay with him and not go with other men, then the next breath he says if you want to date would you see me aswell. Then sends me messages saying don't fall in love with me, then he says if I'm honest I could fall in love with you. I haven't a clue what to think. I like him but don't want it to just be sex. Am I wasting my time? Thanks in advance x

In my opinion he is either playing games or he doesn't know what he wants. If I were you, I'd talk to him. Ask him if he wants to be in a relationship with you. It's better to make things clear. Be honest with him, tell him that you are looking for something serious.

Hi thanks for messaging back. Well I asked him last night and he said he wants me but had been hurt in the past and was scared to get close to anyone else and what did I want. So I said him, no one else etc. He asked if I wanted him for a boyfriend and I said yes. So maybe he was just a little insecure x

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Help with a situation please

I met this girl abroad. I stayed with her and her family. I am clueless when it comes to women. I kind of told myself from the start that I would not get involved with anyone, but she seemed really interested in me and I thought it was romantic. But she was so contradictory, she would switch between being very eager for my attention and involved, seeking me out in the house, behaving jealously when I interacted with other women. To saying that I was not her type. That she wanted to marry someone of her own nationality.

I really liked her but I kept it a secret. I was good friends with her and the family and I did not really know what to do, I did not want to raise her hopes over something I could not deliver, I had my own life back home and I just told myself that she wasn't interested. Even so, it felt like there was a connection, but I was unsure if this was just cultural friendliness. She would never make the first move given her background.

I am rubbish with women. I am 25 and I have never made the approach. I am just pretty clueless. I always assumed that friends and potential partners was just something people said. I didn't and still don't fully comprehend that people (women in particular) often need to make this clear distinction in their heads when assessing relationships with the opposite sex. It is something I have only really learnt recently. I assumed you could befriend a woman and push for a relationship.

...after returning. I was miserable. I just wanted more time with her and regretted not telling her. I loved her, not as a friend, but as a potential partner. I still had her number and she kept calling me a lot. She seemed to be dropping hints all over the place, one being that I should return to the country, but I was reluctant to make a move. Eventually she pushed and pushed beyond all the flirting and I had enough, I told her my deeply held feelings for her and that I wanted to talk about it. There was no answer, but she continued to contact me, she continued to seek out my kind words and supportive comments, she would not leave me alone.

Eventually I became a little desperate, it felt uncomfortable putting myself on the line like that for the first time, and I guess I was quite heavy on the openness front. Eventually I said that I had had enough, I said that she had missed out on a good man because she could not be open with me. I regretted texting her this and said during a phone call that it was a "mistake" and that I was "sorry", she replied "no, sorry for you".

I felt very embarrassed and a little resentful of her. I tried to forget her and move on, but she continued to contact me and seek me out.

I am trying to move on, it sounds awful, but now I have admitted my feelings to her and myself, I don't really want anything to do with her. I am not strong enough to accept it. For a start, she has not even set the record straight with me. How disrespectful is that!? I just wanted an answer, but she wants me dangling by a thread. Now I have realized that women seek me out as a supportive friend. I have female friends, I don't want anymore. Harsh as it sounds, I do not have enough emotional strength to invest in female friendship if there is no hope of something more. I have only just realized this. I want and need to dedicate my time to finding a partner, and women who are serious about a romantic relationship with me.

--------------------------------------

So how do I deal with her now. She still calls me...when I blank the calls she gets all upset and asks if I am fighting with her and her family. How do I tell her that I don't think I can talk to her for a while, it hurts to much.

It almost makes me angry that she is doing this. She doesn't want to commit to me, but she doesn't want me to move on. It hurts a lot.

Help!

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Drunk Text Gone Wrong... Please Help!

Hi all! I have a really touchy situation on my hands that I need resolved by the end of Christmas break. A couple nights ago my brother drunk texted my crush(let's call him Bob) telling him that I like him and he basically asked him out for me. I didn't find out about this until a few days later when my brother confessed it to me. I was really embarrassed so I texted Bob an apolagy, telling him that all of that was a joke and it wasn't true. The text also kind of had a mean tone to it, because I was embarrassed. My brother told me that Bob was mad about the whole situation because he actually did like me until all of this! Anyways, Bob didn't respond to me until three days later. I need to tell Bob how I actually feel because I really like him and I've never had a boyfriend and I'm a senior in high school and I really want to pursue a relationship with him. I asked Bob to meet up with me after his response, so I can tell him, and it's been a day and no response. Where do I go from here? I really need this resolved before school because I have a class with him and it will be even more awkward.

You might think it's going to be more ackward, but actually it might be easier to explain things in person, siince it seems he's
avoiding you because your response. You should've had a mean tone to him, it wasn't his fault what your brother did. When you asked him to meet in peson, did you say you were sorry about what you said, that you didn't mean it, or were you going to wait until a face to face first?

You might think it's going to be more ackward, but actually it might be easier to explain things in person, siince it seems he's
avoiding you because your response. You should've had a mean tone to him, it wasn't his fault what your brother did. When you asked him to meet in peson, did you say you were sorry about what you said, that you didn't mean it, or were you going to wait until a face to face first?
ya after he responded i said "ya again Im really sorry i didnt mean for all that to happen." but hey, would you be willing to meet up with me so i can clear some more things up with you?" he didnt respond to that. I want to get him face to face, but i dont think hes willing to do it..

Last edited by pink77; 12-30-2013 at 04:39 PM.

Wait a few more days. If he still doesn't contact you, try to call him. Or, better, meet him after first classes together and tell him in person what happened. In situations like this it's always better to be honest.

So your crush liked you until you came out and were mean to him saying what your brother said was not true? Sounds like a common misunderstanding and if he doesn’t understand that what you said was out of embarrassment, maybe it is just best to let things be. I agree that you should try to explain the situation face to face and not through text or the phone but do not dwell on the situation. You are young and it is not the end of the world if this doesn’t bud a relationship. Crushes will come and go but if you don’t want to lose him as a friend, be honest with him.

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Opinions and help needed please :-)

Met a Spanish girl in London on her 6 month stay here. I met her on her last month in London and got very close with her. Lots of dates we had, lots of kissing and affection, had sex with her a few times too, i felt very warm in her company. Text pretty much everyday. She said her best month in London was her last one with me. She was going home to see her family for Christmas but shes going back to Spain for 2 months as she is a student who wants to be a teacher, so come to London to improve her English as she wants to teach Spanish in England. She has a masters exam on the first week of February and she said these next 2 months are to revise! Our last weekend together was great! We done soo much, i wanted to give her a weekend to remember with me! At the end of the weekend i took her to the airport where it got a bit emotional between us and she said she is glad that she met me, i also wrote her a little message on the back of this picture frame she bought as a souvenir about what i thought of her and our time together.
She is now back in Spain and i cannot believe how much i miss this girl! I am having all sorts going through my head! The thing is, she told me she never liked talking about the future, or making promises. She did say she will see me again though. She said if she comes back to London it will only be for me. Now she is back in Spain she has told me how happy she is now that she is with her family. I haven't heard from her as much as i use to when she was in London. In fact i hardly hear from her at all! Just the odd little 'hey how are you'. She has told me that she misses me and that our last weekend together was great, but i started a conversation with her the other night and from her reaction it seemed as if i was annoying her and she said, I'm with my friends at the moment. I cant talk right now. I haven't had a proper conversation with her since she has gone back to Spain! She has sent me photos of herself on Christmas day, so i did the same. But again, hardly spoke.

I am amateur when it comes to women. I'm a young guy, I'm 21. This girl is 24 and she is from Seville in Spain, but has lived in Barcelona on and off for 2 years, went to uni in Madrid, and spent 6 months in London. She is very clever. I just don't know what to think now she has gone home. Was this time i spent with this girl just a little fling? Or will something come of this!? I sure hope it does, hence why i tried giving her the best times when she was with me! She did say she will see me again, but said no more. She said she doesn't like making promises or talking about the future. I showed her this song i love when she was in London and the other day she posted it on her Facebook in Spanish saying 'this will always be the soundtrack to them amazing days i spent in London with you.' This made me happy :-)

Please can someone help me. I am just confused.! My mind is all over the place where i have never been in this boat before!
I don't want to message her due to how she is coming across. I don't want to annoy her. But, i would like to know what i should be doing/thinking because i like this girl and i want things to carry on as they were. Or should i stop thinking about this girl now, getting my hopes up that she is coming back because the chances are that she wont!? Will she come back? What is she most likely thinking right now about all this? If she is thinking, she doesn't talk much about it to me!? Is she playing games? Or is she just simply getting on with her life now she is in Spain and I'm just over thinking about the whole situation!?

Any help, much appreciated. Thank you :-)

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mamas boy, need advice please

My boyfriend is in an enmeshed relationship with his mother.

He recently moved in with me and as soon as he told her he would be moving she changed. Snide little comments, telling him she felt forgotten and like he had abandoned her (she has a husband and two younger sons who live with her) making him feel guilty by turning on the water works. She has also started being rude to me. She called him a traitor for taking me out instead of her and the last time i went to their house she completely ignored me.

Their relationship has always been weird. There were times when we were at his parents watching tv. He would be sat with his arm around me or holding my hand and all of a sudden she would start holding his other hand, start poking/tickling him or playing with the hair on his arms. I felt extremely uncomfortable, like i was the third wheel. She would often turn up at his work (which is nowhere near where she lives or would need to go) just to give him a hug or slag off his dad. On the phone she would constantly tell him she missed him and loved him (even though he was still living at home at the time) It started to feel like i was the mistress and his mother was his wife ?! I thought things would improve once we moved in together but if anything its just pushed me out and caused friction between us because im now uncomfortable going to his parents.

Well my issue is. This is our first christmas together and im not going to see him. He says his going to "let his mum have this christmas" then we can spend next christmas as a family. So he is leaving ours early christmas morning and sleeping at his parents christmas night. Which im not happy about but i let it go. Now im expected to go to his parents boxing day (even though his mother totally ignored me last time) and if i dont i wont see him boxing day either. I really dont want to go because i hate conflict and his mother is very intimidating.

I have told him that i would like to spend New Years at home. If he goes with what his mum wants (because she will prob kick off if she doesnt see him New Years Eve) should i break it off? I love him so much and i want him to be the man i marry etc but i dont want to be second string to his mother. If he was ready for a proper relationship and truly loved me i would be the main woman in his life right?

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desperate, please help me

Hey all, I'm in desperate need of some sort of help. I can't tell if I'm ugly or if it's just something I always do wrong but I can never attract any women. In real life and dating websites I can never succeed. Now I managed to meet an amazing women through a dating website but she hasn't texted me back in almost 2 days and I just don't want to lose her too. Please tell me what to do, I can't sleep in fear of this.

You need to relax.. your fears will come through in all you say and do with these women and trust me, we can sniff out insecurities like.. you know.. those dogs that sniff out drugs in the airport lol. It's not appealing in any way. Are you texting her a lot while you wait for her reply? Other than that, there is just too much missing from the story. I don't know the sort of things you talk to her about, but I'm wondering if you're insecurities or the apparent need to be with someone so badly is coming through in your actions and conversations. All I can say is relax. It will come to you, but not if you're pushing it to happen. But again.. I can only go on the little you post here, sorry.

Don't worry so much. Dating is stressful, I know, but I'm sure you'll find love. You can't give up! And you have to believe in yourself. There are women who find you attractive and interesting You just need to find them.
As for this amazing women that you met through a dating website, it's possible she's too busy to text you. Maybe try to call her in the evening? But don't call her too often, it may scare her off.

Well I'm gonna be blunt about this, has someone ever told you that you are attractive aside from your family and friends? Do you consider yourself attractive? Because in all honesty, women are like men you know,what gets us interested initially in a person is looks. Then it's the attitude if we have known you for quite some time. If your answer to the question is yes, then there is something that you are doing that makes the girl lose interest. If the answer is no, then I guess you have to go to the friend zone route to make the girl be interested in you.

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I feel like my relationship is going down the drain. Someone, please help!

I've been with my boyfriend for two years now. At first, everything was great. Now, not so much.
He was raised by a single mother, who is a very nice and independent woman. I think he grew up in that mindset, that women need to completely take care of themselves. Meaning, he doesn't take me on dates, and told me that if he did, he wouldn't pay because "girls shouldn't expect to be paid for". If he drives me somewhere, he will ask for gas money, which I have never done to him when I drive. Whenever we do something, it is always split 50/50, or I end up paying for him. He makes more than three times the amount of money that I do. He just never has any, because he will spend it to the last nickel within 3 days of getting his check, on random things he doesn't need. Im really not a materialistic person. This wouldn't bother me, if he didn't ask me for money constantly.

Also, he never stands up for me. Especially with his friends. They will make very mean jokes about me, and he just laughs along with them. His reasoning is "they do that to everyone". He also vents to his friends about our personal problems, A LOT. Im going through a tough time in my life right now, and he shares very personal things about me that his friends don't need to be knowing. He sees no problems with this, even though they make jokes about it to me.
However, last Valentines day, my coworkers asked what I had done the year before for Valentines. I mentioned that I did nothing, because my boyfriend doesn't believe it should be a holiday. Literally, all I said. When he heard that, he flipped out and said I was making him sound like a horrible boyfriend, and I shouldn't be telling other people about his business. Hmm.

We get into arguments over tiny things, and then he flips them way out of proportion. Even when I tell him to please stop, because I don't want to fight. His response the last time that happened was "Of course, so you're right, and I have to f*cking bow to you?". He will never apologize unless I do first, and this is after hours of him ignoring me, because he needs to "calm himself down". We only fight when I'm PMS'ing, which is "just an excuse", according to him. He is very insensitive when we are having an argument. He has made me cry before, told me to shut up, and then left the room and played video games for the rest of the night.

He had been talking to his ex girlfriend a few months ago, and didn't say anything about it to me. When I confronted him about it, he said that its none of my f*cking business who he talks to, because he's "allowed to have his own damn life".

We don't have sex often, and when we do, Im always the one who initiates it. He has turned me down multiple times, usually because he had planned to hang out with his friends that night. Once, it was because he was playing video games, and "had to finish what he was doing first". When it does happen, it is always a race to the finish line. He says he can't slow down, because he won't last as long. He never kisses me or anything during sex, just goes at it until he's done.

I don't know what to do anymore. He is moving out of my house soon, which will hopefully ease some of the tension. Im just at the point where I feel like I might not be in love with him anymore. I definitely love him, he is my best friend. I just can't handle his immaturity sometimes. This is his first serious relationship, none of the others lasted more than 4-5 months. Im not sure if its something Im doing wrong, or if he's just not very experienced in relationships.

Any advice is greatly appreciated!

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Facebook response after a month?????? PLEASE SOME FEEDBACK

Hello

What does it mean when your crush replies to your private Facebook message after a month?

I send him a casual message on Facebook ( private) saying: hey how have you been?

He did not reply and I moved on and put him out of my head

About a month later I got a reply saying: Hi I hope you are well. your husband is no longer on Facebook so I want to wish you all a happy new year. your son looks great

I am so confused

1. he did not reply to my message how have you been....he totally ignores it and sends me the above
2. why did he reply after a month?

I know He has been online on Facebook before

He has my husband his private e-mail so If he wanted to send him a happy new year he did not have to Im me

Is he just trying to be polite???

Or does he maybe like me and it careful as he knows my now ex husband ( he does not know we split up)

should I reply at all? if so what should i say

I want to know for certain if he likes me or not

He is either not interested and is trying to be polite and does not want to hurt my feelings
or he is interested but is afraid of my husband and does not want any problems or scandals and is not sure if I even like him

I cant just send a fb message saying I like you out of the blue, so How do I make it clear?

thanks for the reply dr girlfriend

Very helpful

We don't live in the same town...so I would prob say something like ; we should get some coffee and catch up next time I am in town

he adores my son......should I add we as in : next time me and ( my son) are in town?

anyone think it is desperate to ask him out for coffee.....? should he not be asking me out?
if he responds how will I know he is saying ok to be polite or because he is interested

I would say maybe don't mention your son and just say he's staying with family if he asks. That way you guys can focus on each other. Also, you are just asking him to coffee to catch up. Its a friendly gesture and clearly not a date. So I don't think you should feel weird about it. Friends want to hang out with friends all the time. Just don't make it awkward, and it won't be.

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Time to move on? Need advice please.

So I'm 18 and I've been on and off with this girl who is also 18 since we were 12-13 but over the past year I've been trying to move on after she told me she had lost interest in us being together, we remained friends since we last broke up (a year ago) and talk quite often.
Obviously if she has no feelings for me I'm more than happy to remain just friends , but every time she is drunk she always rings me up to talk and always arranges to meet up and she tells me she would like to give it another try, I know she is drunk but I feel so strongly for her obviously I am going to get that little spark of hope that it could all work out, like in the films.
The day after the phonecall she stood me up for family reasons, which I am not going to say on here but they are pretty serious at the moment.

Since the phonecall which was about 2 months ago we have been talking like normal but last night I was passing by her house with a friend and I sent her a text to see what she was up to, luckily for me she was just about to arrive at her street on the bus so we finally met up. We stayed out and talked for a few hours, including my friend who is also a good friend of hers, we spoke about old times and good memories we had together back when we were in a relationship and she seemed pretty keen and gave me another spark of hope and we arranged to do something today.
So she rang me about 2 hours ago and we arranged to meet in about 2 hours from now, I text her to see what time she would roughly arrive and I told her that we wouldn't be able to come into my house, she then replied saying that she isn't going to meet me as early so that she will see me later tonight.

I text her asking if she wanted to stay at mine and what time we were going to meet up and she replied saying she can meet me at 4 but only till 6 because she is staying at another boys house -.-
So not only has she ditched our plans and has only made time for 2 hours, she is now sleeping at some random blokes house...
I have no idea what to think, I forgot to mention that when we were younger I used to play her alot and treated her really bad, I mean I used to make her walk home alone and I used to stand her up alot, I am disgusted with what I used to do and I have accepted the fact that I can't expect her to come running back now.
She has gotten her own back on me now as she has been messing me around for nearly 2 years , I totally understand if she's getting her own back but I can't help but hope there is light at the end of the tunnel...
One minute she isn't interested and the next minute she's telling me she can't stop running back to me etc etc...
I'm sorry for the long post but I wanted to make it relatively detailed so I could get the best advice possible, I'm just worried that if she gets away I may not get another chance and may regret it for a while, It's hard to let go of something that's been a part of my life for almost half of my life.

Shall I keep chasing and keep getting hurt with a chance of it all working out? or shall I try to move on and hurt and risk losing somebody that has been a part of my life for so long in reletivity to how old I am?
I would be greatful for any advice, thanks.

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Advice please.

So first post here.

This might be a bit long but here it is.

So there was this girl who worked at the same company as me, we didnt work together, i never had any dealings with here, i hardly ever saw her to be honest. I was always a attracted to her, looks wise shes pretty much my ideal type. Anyway she left but a month or so before she did i had to have some dealings with her so i atleast got to speak to her for a bit. She left and that was that.

So a few months back we had some work drinks and she came along, i spent pretty much the whole night with her, we got on really well, had a laugh, she commented that she liked my look. A few people back at work commented that she seemed "quite keen". Thing is she has a boyfriend so i took it as just being friendly, i sent her a couple of pretty standard chit chat messages on facebook as i dont have her number or anything and left it as that.

Anyway we went out again for someones birthday and she came, again i spent a fair bit of time chatting to her, dancing ect. She told me how its not going to well with her boyfriend, didnt sound like it was going to last to much longer. Anyway end of the night she said bye gave me a kiss and went.

We get on quite well, same age (mid 20s).

Normally i wouldn't even think about it as shes in a relationship and has been for a couple of years i think, i know it may be wrong but i do really like her, i cant stop thinking about it. I have no idea if shes intrested or just teasing. Do i tell her how i feel? Do i wait and see if it does end with her boyfriend as im sure i'll find out? Im a bit confused.

Advice?

I'd wait until her boyfriend was out of the picture

I'd wait until her boyfriend was out of the pictureVery sound advice here. Keep your hands off her until she's available. Available as in freely available. Just because she's being friendly doesn't mean that you should abuse her friendliness.

I think she's lining you up as first reserve while she decides what to do about the boyfriend. If she was really interested in you, she would have dumped him by now. Don't make a move until he's completely out of the picture - that's the honourable thing to do. Besides, if she cheats on him, she could also cheat on you. If you're going to make a relationship with her, start it properly, not in the shadows.

I agree that you should just wait and observe. You can be friendly, but I wouldn't do anything else as long as she is in a relationship. She clearly likes you, but for sure she is also very confused and she doesn't know what to do. Do you know what happened between her and her boyfriend?

Last edited by claudine; Yesterday at 08:43 PM.

I agree that you should just wait and observe. You can be friendly, but I wouldn't do anything else as long as she is in a relationship. She clearly likes you, but for sure she is also very confused and she doesn't know what to do. Do you know what happened between her and her boyfriend?No i don't, i didn't wanna go into to much detail, i think its just not really going anywhere from the sounds of it.

I agree that you should just wait and observe. You can be friendly, but I wouldn't do anything else as long as she is in a relationship. She clearly likes you, but for sure she is also very confused and she doesn't know what to do. Do you know what happened between her and her boyfriend?I dont see her much, only on the odd occasion. Sometimes the odd Facebook message which sometimes she dont reply to and other times theres loads. I dunno if i should just leave it completely and see if i hear anything on the BF thing, or carry on with the odd friendly hows it going type message?

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