Mixed signals - girl (not) mentioning her bf?

Would be great to hear your thoughts on the below situation:

Her: 26y student, MBTI ISFJ, unclear relationship status
Me: 26y management consultant at a top3 Firm, MBTI INTJ, single, very shy (know it sounds funny but isn't)

History: went to school together, 10 yrs ago, had mild romantic interest in each other but never were real friends nor anything beyond, both ended up in different relationships

Now: by chance, we meet again after 10 yrs; exchange phone numbers; agree to meet; I invite her for dinner, we have great 3 hour conversation about our lives and future career plans and about her best girlfriend's relationship troubles; she invites me to go tobogganing together at some point, and to her birthday party; we hug intimately on leaving

She never mentioned a boyfriend at all.

Now at her birthday party, she mentions to me that she 'got to know someone' during this summer and will be spending some time with him in the next month. To her friends, she positioned this guy as her boyfriend.

I was surprised-to say the least-So I totally ignored the comment and talked about unrelated topics. On leaving, she was super nice to me, emphasizing that she wants to stay in touch with me, again intense hugging.

I don't get why she didn't mention a boyfriend earlier on before going out for dinner, or during it. She's certainly not playing double games and just after getting nice dinners.
I genuinely like her and would fight for her, but don't want to put her in a moral dilemma of deciding between two guys. I could get other girls but she'd be the best fit and I just feel she's the right person for me.

Thoughts? Advice? Options?
Thank you!!!

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Confused, mixed messages. Advice please xx

Hi well I've been going with this guy for about 4/5 weeks but only really seen each other 5-6 times. I don't want a friend with benefits and be says he's doesn't either. He gives me mixed messages and I don't really no what to think. He says we click and that he wants me to stay with him and not go with other men, then the next breath he says if you want to date would you see me aswell. Then sends me messages saying don't fall in love with me, then he says if I'm honest I could fall in love with you. I haven't a clue what to think. I like him but don't want it to just be sex. Am I wasting my time? Thanks in advance x

In my opinion he is either playing games or he doesn't know what he wants. If I were you, I'd talk to him. Ask him if he wants to be in a relationship with you. It's better to make things clear. Be honest with him, tell him that you are looking for something serious.

Hi thanks for messaging back. Well I asked him last night and he said he wants me but had been hurt in the past and was scared to get close to anyone else and what did I want. So I said him, no one else etc. He asked if I wanted him for a boyfriend and I said yes. So maybe he was just a little insecure x

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I asked her to be friends, and I'm getting mixed signals. What does it mean?

I'm 25 and my ex is 20. We dated for 10 months and she became really distant with me due to talking to her ex and I believe some confusion in what she wants. She kind of made it clear by her distance and us not talking that she didn't want more from me. So I stopped contact. She came back apologizing and telling me she needed me in her life so we kind of started talking again...however the distance began to happen again and I knew I had to remove myself from the situation. It felt like an off-on thing, and I felt like I was just getting led on with my emotions so I gradually stopped asking what was wrong and what I meant to her and just kept my distance. She tried talking to me a few times, and seemed okay with us talking. She sent me a morning text which was kind of awkward cause I had not received one in 2 weeks....
I suggested being friends a few days ago, and I asked her if she was happy with that, and she said "I guess"...So I questioned that and she told me she didn't know what she felt. I told her to think about it. On her facebook she posts lyrics to a song that is about unrequited feelings and not knowing if your time has passed to tell the person what you feel. (i dont think is a coincidence)
I then talked to her a few days later asking her if she gave it any thought and she seems really distant....she told me she didn't know and that she was not in the mood to talk about it now because she was in a bad mood.
I am not sure entirely what is going on here....but she is really closed off.
Help?? I thought she wanted friends....but than she seems....off?

In my opinion she needs more time to figure out what she needs. So the only thing that you can do is to avoid her for a while.
But if you still have feelings for her, don't try to hide it. Talk to her for the very last time, tell her that you care about her and then stop contacting her. Let her make the next move.

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"lots of love" and other mixed messages...can't see where this guy is willing to go..

Hi all,

Apologies in advance for the very lengthy story ...
I met this guy (D) two years ago through my work. I live in Belgium and he lives and works in the UK. I work in an international NGO and the company for which he works is amongst our members. So now and then we get to meet. Since our first encounter, he has been very kind to me. Shortly after that first encounter, I helped him fix some hotel bookings for a meeting we were organizing and that he was going to attend. The meeting was a huge 3 day bash in Liechtenstein.On site, at one of the side meetings a guy who hadn't registered for it sort of roughhoused me and D came to the rescue . At that time, I had just been hired after 3 months as a temp and my boss was somewhat snooty with me. D witnessed him snapping his fingers at me during a coffee break and D had been previously told by one of my senior colleagues( who had befriended me since day 1 and who's nickname is Charlie aka "Charlie's angels") that my boss was sort of mobbing me ... so D came to me and asked how could I stand being snapped at? I told him in a jokey tone that my boss was so stressed out he was having hallucinations and was mistaking me for Jeeves ( famous butler character in PG Wodehouse's book)... D burst into laughter and asked how the hell I knew who Jeeves was ...And that's how the story began... during the rest of the 3 days of conferences and evening bashes, he would now and then come to me to start a conversation ... For instance: I was standing almost in front of the chart where all the airport shuttles were stated and he would ask me where the chart was ...and after that asking my help to locate his own schedule.... and so on so forth...We parted in a very friendly way and that was that for 2010 and in fact at the time, I just thought he was kind and very handsome, but not much more as I had just called it quits with my son's father ... and I didn't feel in the mood for flirt at all!
In 2011, we were going to Istanbul and he phoned me again to seek my assistance for hotel bookings, which I gladly gave :-). On site, there was some sort of evolution. I was bumping into him a lot... so much that it didn't look like a coincidence anymore. Every now and then, when I was popping of of our "on site office" bam, I bumped into D who also took the opportunity to make some small talk.... Okay, he needed to pass in front of our office to get to his room but ... :-) If I was carrying something heavy, he would insist on helping me , did I go upstairs by foot, he would follow suite... and even once in the lift, he sort of started flirting... The thing is I have a necklace with a key ( symbol of the hotel concierges:I worked for 7 years as a front desk clerk in a 4**** hotel) and so, when we were alone in the lift, he was intently looking at my necklace and said" very nice key you have there , I wonder where it leads to...", I answered him some gibberish about the key but didn't reply directly to his question. Instead, I asked had he shaved his beard... To which he said: "yep, this morning, do I look any younger ? ( D is 13 years my senior) ... Well, at the time, again , I didn't take any hints ... although I found him very attractive and kind... He was just so above my league (hierarchy wise and also experience, education...)... Arrives 2012 and another big bash is scheduled for April in Belgrade. During the planning stage, I notice there is a cock up in his colleague's flight plan and so I very diplomatically mail his colleague with him in copy. Ensued an incredibly long string of mails where each time he was in cc for info , he answered me ...like he wanted to get the conversation going on... and my, oh , my was I happy to see his mails popping in my inbox! April arrives and I go to Belgrade to be onsite...On the day 0 of the big 3 day bash, shortly after arriving at the hotel, guess who pops up in our "office" , casually enquiring if I was done with my work and was I going to attend the welcome cocktail... At my arrival at the cocktail I get the hint from my very good pal "Charlie" that my arrival had had a tangible effect on D who is tentatively making a beeline towards me in what is supposed to be a nonchalant manner... He tried to start a conversation with me in a casual way but I was so shy all over sudden that I cut the conversation short... later on he eventually caught up with me and we chatted for a bit, the rest of our stay there, I will spare you as it was on the same flirty tone... With D teasing me or paying me compliments ... Upon departure , we said, see you next time with a deadline for a huge conference in Qatar in October, then he said, maybe earlier, sweet wishful thinking .... on both our parts I have to say. Turns out he had to attend a meeting I was organizing for a Committee in Brussels. He had a problem with registering which I fixed and he sent me a short but very nice mail with the others concerned in CC it said: "L, Your'e a star it's Official!". When I saw that email and the ones that followed I was besides myself. He and my two other contacts were taking turns complimenting me ... for things I deem absolutely normal. That day, I befriended him on FB as earlier in Belgrade, he had sort of tried to know whether I was on FB , then, again, I didn't take the hint either ... Within, minutes, he accepted my request and from that day onwards we were communicating now and then via FB. Well, mostly him to begin with... I didn't want to appear too clingy ...then progressively , I also commented on his posts. One day, I posted I was going to go to London and his reaction was really speedy... he immediately proposed a drink ... Which onsite became drinks+supper+stroll along the Thames... seasoned with dollops of compliments on both sides. I had already fallen hard for him, but did my best not show it too much. He was going off on holidays the day after with friends . There , with his gang of dudes, they apparently met some gals and one fell for him. So hard, she is all over him like a rash. Posting things on his wall, left, right and center ... Putting a photo of them both as her profile pic(last week or so) , (when he didn't change anything relevant in his info), 2 weeks ago, I commented on one of his shares because it was unavailable outside the UK, so I was saying , "arrgh too bad" His reaction startled me as I wasn't expecting any reaction on that silly post of mine :-) " Well, There is 1 way to solve that problem:-)" Meaning I guess: "come to London"... I answered a bit too noncommittally as I didn't want him to think I was all over him like the other woman. The he started posting all the gold medal stamps RMG was producing for TeamGB.... In the meantime, we communicated a good deal last weekend and he even thought about my birthday. Last weekend , I received a postcard from him at my home adress. Concluding with "lots of love" when he never ever signed like that before... Just xx . When I thanked him in a FB private message ending with lots of love too , the conclusion of his answer was "I'm glad the card hit home. How sweet... :-). Means he is happy that I answered lots of love too ? guys please help me grasp the bigger picture, I feel like I'm in love with a riddle, an extremely kind and handsome riddle, but a riddle all the same ... Or is it our respective jobs ? or is it the age gap, he is worrying about ... , or am I pushing him away without doing it on purpose... Oh, BTW, when I logged in on FB to thank him, I noticed his groupie had changed her profile pic again and he wasn't in the picture anymore, when he was still in the pic24 hours before? Coincidence?

Am at loss and I really do love him to bits even if I try to appear as cool as a cucumber :-) out of fear of rejection...
By the way, i'm a Leo girl and he's a Libra guy. I'm not in all that astrology thing on a day to day predictions basis but I already noticed you could find some personality similarities in persons who were born at the same period of the year.

Please help me! Advice is strongly needed here

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