Boyfriend Material: 7 Reasons You Need To Date A Divorced Guy

According to Patti Stanger, divorced men are a "girl's best kept secret". Here's why you shouldn't throw in the towel on a guy just because his past involves a divorce.

With the divorce rate hanging around the 50 percent mark, there's a decent chance that at some point in your life you'll find yourself smitten with a divorced guy and you'll be faced with the decision of whether or not dating him is a good idea. While it may seem a little shady at first— especially if he has extra baggage like kiddos — divorced men sometimes have more to offer than guys who have never taken the plunge.

According to the Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger, divorced men are a "girl's best kept secret".

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Well, we're letting the secret out now. Here's why.

1. He believes in serious, longterm commitment.
Although it may have not worked the first time around, the fact that he did get married shows that he believes in commitment. That’s a big deal in a society that's becoming more and more disillusioned with marriage.

2. The sex is awesome.
Statistically, married couples have sex less than those who aren’t hitched. According to The Social Organization of Sexuality, 80 percent of married couples only have sex a few times a month. If that was the case in his past relationship, just think about how buck wild he'll be in the sack now that he's with someone who wants to do it all the time, or at least more than his ex-wife.

3. He "gets" it.
He’s been there and done that. He understands about ups and downs, petty arguments, and the struggles that come with a serious relationship. It's not easy to keep things smooth sailing at all times, and just because his marriage didn't work out, it doesn't mean he's not up to the challenge to do it again.

4. Insta-family.
If you're cuckoo for babies, but aren't ready to have a few of your own, then a divorced guy who has a kid or two will give you the baby-fix you're looking for without overwhelming you and crowding your style.

5. He's housebroken.
I'm definitely not one to equate men with dogs, even when they're being the absolute worst, but Stanger says, "Divorced men come already housebroken. Another woman has done the hard work of teaching him to put the seat down, call when he's late, and tread lightly during a bad week." Good point, and definitely a plus.

6. He has his ducks in a row.
Having been married and then divorced, he's not only had his fair share of drama, both good and bad, but he's probably had ample opportunity to do some soul-searching. A man, who knows who he is and what he wants, is always a catch.

7. He's learned from his mistakes.
As with any relationship that has failed, romantic or otherwise, lessons are always learned. A divorced guy who signed up for the long haul, but didn’t quite make it can probably stare his mistakes in the face and realize how not to make them again.

Takeaway? Don't throw in the towel on a guy just because his past involves a divorce. Relationships start and end everyday, and if we didn't give people a chance just because they have a breakup under their belt, then we'd totally miss out on the potential for something great.

Have anything to add to the list? Tell us in the comments below.

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Are Divorced Men Capable Of Commitment? [EXPERT]

38.8% of married men divorce between the ages of 20 and 24. Does a divorce in his past signify marriage-mindedness, or is it precisely the opposite?

Are you a woman who wants to be in a committed relationship or married? If so, and you're only considering men who have never been married, you may be limiting your options.

A good segment of the male population has been married and divorced. In fact, 38.8 percent of married men divorce between the ages of 20 and 24; Twenty-two-point-three percent of men divorce between 25 and 29 years old; and 11.6 percent of men divorce between 30-34 years old.

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I still believe you can find happily ever after with a divorced man. I have even seen it first-hand with many of my good friends. You just need to know what to look for.

Is he marriage-minded?

A guy who has worked through his issues from his divorce and has healed himself is capable of committing to the right woman. He has committed before and will tend to choose better the next time around. He now knows what it takes to make a marriage succeed and will take responsibility to make things right. This guy will tend to be less self-centered and open to resolving issues that come up. If he has kids, he will tend to be more giving and nurturing.

A guy who is marriage-minded will be consistent with his behaviors and actions. He will spend time with you, call and text you during the in-between times, make plans with you in advance and talk about your future together. He will treat you with love, affection and respect. You'll meet his family and friends and he will meet yours.   

Or, is he incapable of commitment?

Don't get enamored with a divorced guy who has cheated on his ex-wife, is verbally, mentally, emotionally or physically abusive, is going through a mid-life crisis, has a substance abuse problem with drugs and alcohol, a gambling problem, pornography addiction, equates commitment with a jail sentence, can't hold a job and/or blames his ex for his problems and divorce. This guy is not able to commit and you won't be the one to change him. Keep reading ...

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3 Tips For Dating A Divorced Guy [EXPERT]

Is your man divorced? In some ways it's tricky, in other ways it isn't at all.

In some ways, dating a divorced guy is no different than dating a guy who has never been married. However, there may be some crucial differences. Here are three tips to keep in mind when dating a recently divorced man.

1. Marriage. First, a divorced man may be more cautious or even opposed to the idea of getting married again. This may be especially true if he went through an ugly divorced, he was betrayed by his wife or if the divorce cost his a lot of money. The Truth About Dating Men From The Bar [EXPERT]

Although women are often portrayed as the ones likely to carry emotional baggage from previous relationships, men do too. If this is the case with the guy you are interested in, the important thing is to not push him. If the relationship develops in a positive direction, he may very well change his attitude towards marriage. However, if you are constantly bringing up the idea of marriage, trying to pressure him into marriage or verbally bemoaning the fact you want to get married, you are likely going to push him away.

2. His ex. The second thing you need to understand is that his ex-wife will always be apart of his life story. He may still be in contact with his ex or he may have friends and family that are still in contact with her. Even if he has no contact with his ex, you may run into people when you are out together that bring up his ex or ask him questions about the divorce.

You cannot erase the fact he has an ex-wife. Getting irritated, mad, insecure or depressed every time her name is going to ruin your relationship. Some men go through amicable divorces and still have a peaceful relationship with their ex-wives. Just because they couldn't make a marriage work, doesn't mean they are unable to make a friendship work. 16 Facts Every Single Girl Needs To Know [EXPERT]

You need to either be secure in yourself and your relationship or end things. Being jealous or demand that he stop talking to her is not going to lead to a fulfilling relationship for the two of you.

3. His kids. Finally, if he has kids with his ex you need to show respect for the relationship they have as co-parents and the relationship his children have with their mother. Saying negative things about her to him, or in front of the children, is the worst possible thing you can do for your relationship, for the children and for the co-parenting situation.

Even if his ex-wife isn't in the picture and he is the full-time parent, no child should have to hear dad's new girlfriend bashing their mother. If the ex-wife is actively in the picture and this is a man you hope to get serious with, your best move is to find a working relationship with his ex. You don't have to be friends, but you do need to respect the fact that you are both an active part of the children's lives.

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