stuck in a rut

ive only joined this site today as i was after some advice,, after reading through old posts i see im not the only one!!! ive just turned 31 have a little boy and have been single for 3 years... i have had 2 long relationship which apart from 1 good thing(my son) have turned out to be a compleate waste of time...
i have tried online dating, meeting people when on nights out and i find all people want is one thing...

i am a very honest(maybe a littletoo honest) caring funny girl who wants to share my life with some one.. how do i meet my mr right??? life is just flying by and living it alone is just not the same

I would just keep doing what you are doing. You can't force a meeting with Mr.Right... it just happens. Keep going on dates and have a good time.

Don't look at your relationships and failed dates as a waste of time. Sure you aren't with them now but I'm sure you learned things from them and I'm sure there were good times and fun days in the mix. Just because they aren't around now, it doesn't mean it was wasted time

I'm sure you will find somebody or somebody will find you soon or later. There is somebody special for every one of us. Just be patient and have your eyes open because maybe he is somewhere nearby, you just haven't noticed him yet. It's great that you are trying so many different ways to find love, just don't give up.

Hello, Ammie. Looks like you are very lonely ...I call those moments as true blue moments. I felt like that for some time. I am also uncommitted now, for years already, but I don't feel lonely even though I am literally "alone", romantically speaking. You're still young, you know; you don't need to be desperate right now. Maybe what you need to do is don't look for someone to fit your "void". You are vulnerable at the moment and any guy who gives you even a little extra attention could sweep you off your feet. That's a time when most women in the same boat as yours make the fatal mistake of FALLING FOR WRONG GUYS.

oH MY... don't hunt for love when you're in that mood, dear. Work on redirecting your focus on something else, like improving yourself, acquiring some really helpful skills, furthering your education, or moving one level higher in your work. Anything positive to keep your focus away from loneliness. Have a makeover; find a feel-good therapy which will help you rise above your depression. When you're bouncy again and feeling confident, you won't have to look around anymore because guys will take notice of the new you that you have become!

The law of attraction..... be a better person and you will attract good and better men! (^_*) That's supposed to be a wink! Lol

Goodluck, my dear!

I'd say take your time, don't rush it, if "Mr. Right" is out there he will find you, the two of you will find each other. Being alone is the best way to find out who you are, it's the best way to grow. Once you are 100% comfortable with yourself you will be able to co-exist and be comfortable with someone else. One thing you must understand about guys is that we can sense desperation in women, and I am not saying that you are desperate because I know absolutely nothing about you, and can only go by what you posted.

If you give off that melancholic vibe of, "woe is me, can't find a good man, where are all the good men," some guys are charlatans in that he can assume, transform, or emotionally shape-shift into whatever guy he needs to be to grab your attention. He can get away with this because the subject of his [lustful] desire is not thinking clearly and allowing her emotions in that moment, to be her guide.

He pounces on this, like a lioness on her prey, and before you know it, he's moved on to his next victim.

Sounds harsh, sounds cold, but that can be the true reality if you don't know who you are and you're not comfortable being alone for a period of time. That's not saying, "I'm alone because I am currently not dating," you have to get to a point where you're actually comfortable with yourself and just happen to not be in a relationship. This is when your growth occurs and the charlatan I just mentioned, can be spotted from a mile away. As a matter of fact, he won't even approach you because you're no longer giving of the scent (vibe) that he is attracted to.

Last edited by taskeinc; Yesterday at 09:22 PM.

I agree compeletly with taskeinc . Love finds you, believe it or not. Just go out, live your life, by all means, talk to new people and such but don't sit and wait and wonder. I don't believe everyone has someone they are meant for, only a few lucky people do. However I also believe, whats meant to be will always find a way. Now the guy I am in love with now... so didn't expect him to come in my life, and I was actually content with my life being single, but then BAM, and now Im love struck, only not sure if its only 1 sided. so sometimes, it can still suck, id trade my feelings anyday to be single and content again. they are here to stay though, damn things lol
Anyway... just keep being a great mom and have fun, mr right will come along if/when he is meant to and you will know

Thasnk for your replys... I am lonely but not desperate at all infact sometimes I feel it would be difficult to let someone in my life after being alone for a while. The 3 years I have been single I have quilified to be a teaching assistant and I have come a long way .. I am so much more confident, love spending time with friends and family. I am normally not bothered by all this being alone, just this weekend soemone I really cared about took my for grantend. ( My first/last post on here) and its made me feel a little down in the dmps!!!

I'm sure it won't last for long and I'll be back to my happy self. Just makes me a little less trusting.
Thanks for the advice its making me see that nobody is worth putting your self down for!!

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